“The Science of Attraction and Relationships”
“I just wanted to say how much I enjoyed Mairi’s workshops. The workshops are a fun way to think about what is a bit of a foggy area for some folks. It would be wrong to say that the workshops give you all the answers, but they do get you asking the right questions, both of yourself and others around you. I have to credit my time in the workshops with helping me find the happy and stable relationship I’m now in and in turn making life a lot more content.”
Robert Sneddon, 38
Tired of the fluffy relationship pseudo-psychology in self-help books? Would you like to understand the real science behind our desires and preferences and how it can help you in your own relationships?
Come along to our workshops where we’ll explain what the latest research in psychology and biology tells us about attraction and relationship dynamics in men and women. This will all be presented in a fun, informal, and easy to understand format with plenty of discussion and interaction encouraged (though not obligatory). No previous scientific knowledge required!
Through various short questionnaires you will be able to determine your own personality type, your sociosexuality score, your attachment style and more and then enjoy a multimedia presentation on the science with presenter led discussion among participants. You will learn how the research findings apply to you, helping you to understand your own and others’ relationships, feelings and desires, and allowing you to predict outcomes and make the best relationship decisions.
Also, have fun, make new friends, and enjoy tea/coffee/biscuits in the breaks, and a delicious lunch (depending on venue). Adults of all ages welcome!
Book now to secure your workshop slots – places limited!
Workshop Topics:
To see which topics are included in each Workshop Session please see details in “Upcoming Workshops” on this page.
Topic 1: What do we want in a partner?
In the first session we’ll look at what men want and what women want in terms of physique, intelligence, personality, and so on, and how this can change dramatically depending on the context and the situations we find ourselves in, the life stage we’re at, and the type of relationship we’re looking for.
We’ll show how our unique attributes can ultimately be far more important to our long term attractiveness than the first impressions we give, and we’ll talk about the implications for how we meet people and present ourselves in online dating.
There will be discussion of the effects on attractiveness of age, acting dumb, wearing high heels, cosmetic surgery and lots more, and we’ll also talk about how our own “mate value” affects the way we can trade-off the demands we make of potential partners.
Topic 2: Personality and Relationships
In this session you’ll discover your own personality type, and then we’ll talk about the pros and cons of different personalities, which personality types are attracted to each other and which are the best to choose as mates. We’ll look at how personality and attitudes impact on what men and women find attractive.
Then we’ll go on to think about creativity and intelligence. You’ll find out just why musicians and artists can be so sexy and it might get you dusting off that old violin…
We’ll discuss how hormones affect our sexual personalities. Then there are the pros and cons for women of going for men with exciting, competitive personalities, why some women are always attracted to the bad boys, and how to cope if you are one of them. And tips for nice guys too!
We’ll also talk about potentially abusive personalities, and how to spot the charming control freak.
Topic 3: Are We Built For Monogamy?
This is where we find out about promiscuity and chastity, infidelity and deception and whether or not we’re ‘designed’ for lifelong monogamy.
First we’ll discuss the concept of sociosexuality, or sexual restrictedness, and you’ll be able to determine your own score. We’ll discuss the causes and effects of our sociosexuality score and discover whether or not men and women really differ in their sex drive and sexual restrictedness (NB. You won’t have to reveal your score!).
We’ll talk about men’s sexual strategies; the committed guy vs. the playboy, and we’ll discuss women’s strategies and the factors affecting their sociosexuality, including religion, sex ratio and economic dependency.
Then we’ll get on to the thorny subject of infidelity: Why men are unfaithful and how to spot a potential infidel. Why women are unfaithful; the role of hormones and why women’s infidelity is increasing. We’ll talk about the reasons married men have affairs and why some women are willing to be mistresses and we’ll discuss what the options are if you find yourself as a plan B partner.
We’ll conclude this session with a discussion of whether or not humans have evolved to be monogamous or whether we should look at different models for our relationships. Can we make monogamy work, and how can science help us?
Topic 4: Attachment Styles and Relationships
In this session you’ll learn about what attachment styles are and how they come about. You’ll find out what your own attachment style is and how this affects the way you handle relationships.
Here we’ll discuss the best way to secure a secure partner and avoid an avoidant and we’ll talk about the pros and cons of “playing hard to get”. And if you have a partner with an anxious or an avoidant attachment style, you’ll learn how to cope with this and help them to become more secure.
Topic 5: Odour and Attraction
Here you’ll discover how good your sense of smell is and how important smell is in attracting a partner, in relationship satisfaction, and the importance of sniffing out a partner who smells ‘right’.
We’ll look at the effects of wearing fragrance or deodorant on attractiveness in men and women, how it combines with our natural odour and how we should choose a perfume.
We’ll also talk about kissing, what it’s for and why that first smacker is so important. We’ll also discuss the importance of body hair for broadcasting our personal fragrance and the effects of depilation fashions in men and women.
Finally in this session we’ll look at how hormonal contraceptives change women’s perception of body odour signals and how the ‘pill’ might affect our partner choice and relationship satisfaction.
Topic 6: Relationships of the Future
In this final session we’ll talk about how the dynamics of relationships are changing with advances in technology and changing society.
We’ll start by discussing the sex ratio – the number of men relative to the number of women – and how this impacts on relationship success for each gender. Here you’ll also get some tips on how to find the best ratio for the kind of relationship that you want.
We’ll talk about how the “Biological Clock” is a man thing as well as a woman thing, and about how new reproductive technologies have the potential to level the playing field between genders.
We’ll look at the increasing diversity of relationship types and sexuality, and how men’s and women’s sexual proclivities converge, with converging gender roles; cougars and ladettes, toyboys and metrosexuals, sugar daddies and sugar mummies (yes, I meant mummies and not babies).
We’ll discuss the rise in childlessness – by choice and not – and its causes in men and women. And we’ll talk about women’s financial ascendance and its impact on relationships and gender roles, and how men and women must change their attitudes about what they expect from their relationships and partners if they are to keep up with the times.